Wendy's Blog

It’s IMPOSSIBLE to Stay Down Forever

by Wendy Keller

The day we buried my children was the worst day of my life, of course. Afterward, emotionally exhausted and in extreme pain from two hours sitting up in a wheelchair, I was lying on my hospital bed.  My mother came and took my hand.  She said, “When you get this far down, there’s only one direction left to go.”

Somehow, that thought has stuck with me ever since.  You can only get so low before things MUST change.  Even the addicts call it “reaching bottom.”  It seems to me like life is always on a continuum, from high to low.  Every aspect of our life is on it’s own continuum.  I have rarely in my life had “all the plates spinning” at the same time. There’s always one that’s broken or wobbling. Getting around to being OK with that inevitability seems like the path to peace.

Here’s the only guarantee of human existence that I’ve ever seen (beyond birth and death): if you’re at the bottom, things will start to go up again.  You will start to move back up the spiral.  You may THINK you’re at the bottom and find out it can get worse, but after that, it’s gotta start getting better.  It’s a law of nature.  After the wildfire took out my home – heck, my entire neighborhood – the landscape was black, gray and sooty.  Drive there now, and other than some charred but living trees, it looks very green and lush. But to those who know, that’s not how it used to look.

If you’re is attached to how it used to look, used to be, used to feel, you’re in trouble.  Getting used to How Things Are  Now is about 90% of the trick of letting things get better. “Better” may not be the better you prefer, but the human soul cannot survive in anguish forever.  Things will eventually change and you will be at peace, you will find joy, things will get better one day.  You’ll see.  Practice looking for the upswing – cuz it’s a-coming!

 

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[addtoany]
 
  1. I am sorry but I highly disagree with your paragraph. I have prime example; I have experienced 2 miscarrieages with the same woman in less than 7 month’s apart from each other, this was the first 2 times in my 36 years of life that I actually experienced the opportunity of being a father. Well 3 weeks after the second one the female kicked me out and the times continued to spiral down even more. I have not talkedto her in 14 month’s and my finances have dwendaled to nothing and I am abut to lose my car, car insurance, cell phone and can’t pay any other bill’s. and there is no light at the end of the tunnel. So this is why I disagree with your statment.

    • Rob,

      Well, all I can say is “congratulations” because it sounds like you’ve hit bottom, which really does leave you only one direction to go. I bet your whole world will look different – better – in six months or a year. IF you take the very next possible action (whatever it is) to improve your overall situation, you will see another appear. And then another. (Not in an hour, but in a day or a week, certainly!) Follow those steps and just watch where they lead you!

      Wishing you love, peace and joy,
      Wendy

    • Rob, I am just gonna say that my heart breaks for you. That does sound pretty rough, but I can tell you that if you retain some hope of something, things will eventually get better. Don’t give up, don’t stop being Rob, and don’t stop reaching. Find something to reach for and reach! I have been through some crap too, and I am not where I want to be, but my life isn’t bad, and like Wendy says you should be on your way up now. Jason

  2. Hi Wendy,

    Life is perpetual change… Some folks seem to be handed more challenges than most. And, most of the time, things get better. And other times you just have to hang on, hope and do your best…and be grateful in and for all things.

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