Wendy's Blog

What If You’ve Lost Your Self?

by Wendy Keller, author, blogger, mother, workshop leader

Remember when you were a little kid?  You had SO many creative ideas!  Maybe you’d star in a movie or cure cancer or write books!  Maybe you’d become a ballerina or an artist or a craftsman.  Somewhere along the way, the responsibilities and toils of life probably squelched your creative spirit.  Ah well, dreams are for kids…right? Nope.

Grown-ups need dreams to be happy. 

To feel like they’re making a contribution.

To feel alive.

If you’ve gotten into adulthood and have this gnawing sense that your life was meant for something else, something bigger, something that lights the fire within your soul, this blog might contain an important clue to getting your mojo moving again.

Yesterday, a dear friend dolefully reported that he used to write songs and sing in the shower, and he doesn’t know when he stopped.  His life is sadder without his songs.  So I told him the story that I’m about to tell you.

About two months ago, I was talking to my astonishing life coach Michael Naylor.  I told him how I used to love to write, but the creativity in my soul had dried up more than three years ago. I no longer woke up with book ideas in my head.  (I’m the author of 31 published nonfiction books under 9 pseudonyms,  plus a bunch of self-published ones, so I’m used to books in development – and in my head!)  I told him “I miss my muse.” 

Michael asked, “How did it go away?”

I answered, “I told it to give me a break. I was too busy to be creative. I don’t have time to write.”

Michael asked me what might happen if I asked it to come back into my life. I had no answer.  I fumbled around for one. (PS – I don’t believe the Muse is a Greek woman in a diaphanous gown. I don’t know what “it” is – call it anything you like. If you ever were a creative person, you know what I mean!)

Finally, I said, “I think I should apologize for sending it away.  Then invite it to come back and act on whatever thin threads or huge gushes of inspiration show up after that.”

Apologize, invite and act.

Sounded like a plan.

I did that.  On Monday, I will finish the entire first draft of the manuscript of what I believe will be my 32nd book – and this one will be under my own name.  I have written from a deeper, more grounded place than ever before, and I have been transformed by the process of writing this particular content. My heart has been enraptured when I’m working on it.  I’m happy. I’m even happier just doing my usual work, too. Even if it never gets published, I acted on the inspiration I received.

If you’re trying to cope with sadness, depression, continual hardship, isolation, a job you hate, a life you find dull or meaningless – perhaps it’s because you’re denying your creative gifts.

About 3,000 people tell me every year that they are writing a book.  (I’m a literary agent by trade)  I live in LA, so hundreds more tell me they want to be actors or filmmakers or screenwriters.  I talked to a friend recently who told me he had wanted to join the circus when he was a boy.  How many are listening for their creative “muse” and taking action?

What’s your dream?

Have you turned off YOUR muse?

What could lure it back to whispering to you in quiet hours?

How would your life change if you decided to simply…apologize…invite….and act?


If you liked this post – if it touched

some part of your heart –

please share it with your friends.  

Free to reprint or repost with attribution.
By Wendy Keller, courtesy of www.WendyKeller.com
  1. @chefdanodans says:

    I’m a Chef, opening my second restaurant. I sat down to finish the menu tonight for the new place. Thank you. I thought I might be nuts.

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