Comfort for those who’ve lost their mother or father by Wendy Keller In the last six months, 17 of my friends, clients and acquaintances have had a parent die. This huge, shocking number shakes me to my very core, as I have four parents, all of them approximately 70 years old. One of my closest girlfriend’s hateful estranged mother’s dying words were “Get out of my room.” She was a bad mother and a cruel lady to her last breath. My high school sweetheart’s father, whom I loved for his kind ways, died...
read moreWhat to do when you’re at the very, very end of your rope by Wendy Keller, author, speaker, survivor If you’ve never seriously considered committing suicide, chances are high you’ll judge this article as “bad” or “wrong.” That’s OK. It’s not written for you. It’s written for the thousands of people all over the world – including someone you know – who are considering or even plotting the end of their own life right now. The first time I made careful plans to kill...
read morePeace of Mind is the Ultimate Goal. How do you get it under the circumstances? by Wendy Keller, author, inspirational speaker, woman who cares It’s been a few days since I’ve posted anything original, because I’ve been stuck on a few sentences in a book. The book is called “Being Peace” by the Vietnamese monk Thich Naht Hanh. This is not the first time I’ve read this book, but since last time, someone must have come along and added a few sentences I never noticed before. Does that ever happen to you? The...
read moreHow to Change Your Response Before You Open Your Mouth by Wendy Keller Especially when we’re dealing with the fallout of trauma, extreme stress or suffering, it’s easy for other people to trigger our issues. Sometimes, they pick off the scab of an old wound. Sometimes, they are just innocent wanderers who tripped a wire in our heads or hearts. Now we have super-charged feelings that FAR out-respond to what’s really going on. The easiest thing to do is react – or over-react. We’ve all done it and paid the...
read moreThe Value of Skill and Flexibility by Wendy Keller, author, inspirational speaker, compassionate woman On my morning walk alongside the sea wall, I came upon a snowy white egret searching for breakfast among the rocks. At first, it was wary of my presence. We eyed one another for a while. Then it so slowly and cautiously resumed its task while I watched motionless. It darted its head into the water emerged with a beakful. I could see a tiny fish wriggling for freedom. Two gulps and it was bird food. The remarkable thing was the...
read moreWhy We Pretend We’re OK Now – and What to Do About It by Wendy Keller My dear old friend is going through divorce after 20+ years. She’s got four teenagers and her soon-to-be-ex is being shady about the money. When I call her, she uses a fake chirpy voice to tell me everything is “going just great!” and then, within a few minutes, she remembers it’s me – and she starts telling the truth. My friend Larry’s mother died suddenly in late February. Two weeks later, he was telling people,...
read moreKnow When To Fold ‘Em, Know When to Walk Away, Know When to Run… by Wendy Keller My daughter is nearly 20, finishing her sophomore year in college and preparing for a big adventure working in Europe for the summer. She’s usually reasonably sweet and sometimes, I enjoy living with her. She moved back into my home for the third time about 5 weeks ago and leaves on June 2. This trip has come about quite suddenly. I know she’s feeling extraordinary stress about the whole thing. So she’s taking it out on...
read moreYour Thoughts Create Your Reality by Wendy Keller There’s one little thing that separates those who give up and accept the heartache, pain, drama, trauma and difficulties in life as their unfortunate lot. It’s the single ingredient in those who “survive” and those who even somehow manage to “thrive” after bad things happen. It’s free to everyone. It’s completely calorie free. It’s relatively rare and thus semi-precious. It can be difficult to keep once you get it. It is the most potent...
read moreReal Help & Best Advice for People Hurting Right This Minute by Wendy Keller, author, speaker, a woman who cares This article is for people whose lives are in crisis right now, this minute, and who are suffering in the early days of overwhelm, anguish, confusion, shock and wondering “How in the world am I supposed to deal with this?” What are you supposed to do when your whole life is falling apart? Here are FIVE TIPS I learned when my children died in a car accident in 1991, and then my home burned down in a wildfire in 2007...
read moreWhy we change…and why we don’t by Wendy Keller, author, speaker, woman who cares We all say we want our lives to get better. We want to leave the toxic relationship at home or at work. We want to stop over-eating or feeling angry at our kids or hating our jobs. We want to take a shot at living our best lives, getting the dream job or marrying the person we love. We all know we don’t want to hold onto negative people, places, things and feelings for too long. So what keeps us from making the changes we need to make our...
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