Wendy's Blog

Is there more happiness or more sorrow in your life right now?

Four friends have buried a parent in the last few months, one has buried his grown child.

Eleven people I care about are going through divorces, all in various stages and emotions.

Quite a few people I know are battling depression.  Two are dealing with dementia. A girlfriend who has early Alzheimer’s just found out that her husband has a fast-growing brain tumor.

A colleague’s husband got diagnosed a few days ago with pancreatic cancer.  That tends to take people fast. They’ve been married 21 years.

What is happening in your life that caused you to read this?

Are you feeling overwhelmed by your own life?
Lots of people are. You’re not alone. At times like these, everyone looks for help, for hope, for something to cling to.

How are we supposed to handle it when bad things happen?

What do we do when we are engulfed by that great internal distress, the relentless waves of disappointment, called “sorrow”? Is there any way to cope, to survive, to keep breathing despite the pain?

My general opinion is to look for and cling to whatever good you can find, but that seems so thin a response to those who are so deeply discouraged. Surely there has to be a better way to help ourselves and others?

I asked this question of my dear friend Marc Allen, author of “The Magical Path” and a deep thinker. This is what he said. If you’re hurting, let these words spread like a warm oil over you. Let them sink into your skin and nourish your wounded soul. Marc wrote:

“Your email is sad, sweet, and touching… I had some more thoughts…

Yes, life is a bitch, and then you die.

Yet there are children laughing in the rain, splashing in the mud. Some of them die too, and that is wrenching and painful. But some of them live for a hundred years, and find love in their lives and have children and grandchildren. And life goes on and on.

Some of us struggle all our lives, but some of us can find peace, most of the time, in spite of it all.

It is there within us, waiting to be found. It is love, pure love.

Love your pain, love your grief, love yourself, fall in love as much as possible with as many people and things as possible, including sunsets and flowers and kittens and family and friends and books and TV shows… the list is endless….

As Ramana Maharshi said, so sweetly, ‘The end of all wisdom is love, love, love.’ ”

I loved this so much, it is so eloquently stated, that I wanted to share it with you to help you at this precise moment in your life. I believe that if you stumbled across these words today, they were meant for you to find.

So the questions for you are these:

What good can you see in your life right now? What small, tiny smile can you find outside the window of your house, your car or even your hospital room? Life is all around you. What you focus on is what you see.

I hope you feel better soon.

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